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Budget to Fight Terrorism
Our Budget FM (read Finance Minister not Frequency Modulation) made public early July a government budget with the principle of investment in peace. Unfortunately, he did not specify in detail the responsibilities of the different departments of the government for the success of the idea of countering terrorism. Here is a list of what I would have done.
DEPARTMENT WHAT THEY WILL HAVE TO ACCOMPLISH
Dept. of Agriculture Step up research in technologies that could make food-grains invisible so that the farmers could show their empty granaries to the terrorists when they try to extort food from the farmers.
Dept. of Commerce Develop methods to fleece the exporters and importers by levying duty, surcharge, supercharge and additional charge on all the things that pass through customs though the things not passing through customs would not be disturbed.
Dept. of Defence Realise a breathtaking increase in contracts awarded to defence industry facilities located in the home districts of Red comrades, thereby ensuring an ever-expanding weapons stockpile for use in the never-ending war against invisible terrorism.
Dept. of Local Development Continuously search for hardy individuals who are ready to take up positions in the local government bodies and take on the terrorists when the present set of individuals is removed by the terrorists.
Dept. of Suspension Bridges Construct dummy bridges across various rivers so that the terrorists would be busy destroying them while the defence force would be busy constructing the road to Karnali.
Dept. of Education Protect Nepal’s parochial school/college boards from the insidious dangers of terrorism by making the students memorise preachings against terrorism.
Dept. of Energy Never get tired of talking about the mythical hydropower potential of 83,000 MW to fight terrorism.
Dept. of Law & Justice Actively liberate the imprisoned drug traffickers and Charles Shovraj and specially deploy them to con the terrorists.
Dept. of Transit Transform Nepal into a port through the ambitious expansion of a four lane road to let the terrorists flee to either China or India as soon as possible.
Dept. of Interior Systematic deforestation of vast tracts of domestic woodland widely known to provide camouflage and a safe haven for terrorists.
Dept. of Information Find out ways to monitor and block various communication channels such as FM radio broadcast, mobile telephones, foreign TV channels and the internet.
Dept. of Mines Stop excavating for minerals like petroleum and iron and start excavating the landmines laid down by the terrorists.
Dept. of Foreign Affairs Issue statements chiding the foreign diplomats whenever they make any public comment unpalatable to the present administration.
Dept. of Treasury Buy sufficient Indian currency from India, which was out of the stock as it was used extensively by the terrorists to buy weapons from India.
Since it is never too late to start fighting terrorism, the Budget FM may consider these for prompt implementing. I bet that no one in these departments would try to shirk their responsibilities.
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