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telelogo4.jpg (7056 bytes)   Kathmandu,Wednesday, 03 January 2001

2nd SECOND IMPRESSION


-With malice to none-
Who could be behind recent unrest in Nepal ?

Place:Prime Minister’s official residence, Baluatar
Time: early morning 6.18am
Agenda: Hritik Roshan’s alleged utterances
Special guest:Actor Bhuvan K.C
Others: the entire cabinet members.

All the guests have arrived including the cabinet ministers. Since the room has no heaters so every body could be seen shivering as the mercury has dipped down. However, most of the attending participants see each other’s face and ask the reason for this emergency meeting. In the meantime, the Premier enters the room and greets his colleagues.

PM: Thank you gentlemen for your kind presence. I feel very guilty in having invited you at this time. I could see some of you still in sleepy mood because of perhaps last night’s over dose of the booze. Since the situation has become already grave and it might even cost our "’beloved"’ chairs if not controlled on time. Some forces inimical to my rule and my faction of the congress, from within and without have again converged with single agenda and that being to unseat me. You know if I’m gone, you will be left nowhere. People in the streets might manhandle you for your previous misconduct.

Minister left to PM: But Mr. Premier, tell us what is the event in effect that has made you so nervous, as I could read it from your face.

PM: You naughty boy, I’m coming to that point. I do not know who is this Hritik Roshan in India. His utterances created a furore in Nepal to the extent that HM summoned me to report on the unfolding disastrous events that occurred in Kathmandu and elsewhere. Even Atal Jee talked over telephone and has told me to control the situation in Nepal or else…. You know what happens when India becomes angry. Just recall the year 1989 and the subsequent events that followed here. I’m told that he is a film actor. I dialed Manisha in Mumbai but some body told me that she is busy with some high-ranking diplomat posted in Kathmandu. The extent of violence is increasing and I think that some "reactionary elements" were hell bent on throwing me out of the chair that I love so much you know it better. Who could have prompted Hritik to utter such derogatory words for Nepal? As if that were not enough, K.R.Malkani’s fresh undiplomatic utterances too have compounded my problems here. Thanks Almighty that he has apologised and Atal jee has assured me that Malkani’s views was his private one. This is my concern. If any one of you possess any clues regarding Hritik’s unsubstantiated remarks please feel free, I’m ready to listen. The floor is open now. Before I give the microphone to you, let me tell you that till today no body has been able to produce the proof of the supposed fault of the film star. Yes please go on….

Minister right to the PM: As Hritik is a film actor so our actor Bhuban K.C would be the right person, Mr. Premier, to talk on this topic.

Bhuban K.C: Thanks Mr. Premier for giving me this rare honor. When I began working in Nepali films, this Hritik was just born. He is the son of Rakesh Roshan. His film KAM-CHOR is still a hit. Significantly, Hritik’s father is a balded person. He wears wigs but no body knows except his intimate colleagues including his wife indeed. May be film actress NANDA, Dharmendar, Madhuri Dixit could have prompted him to utter such remarks against Nepal.

Minister without portfolio: No Mr. Premier, I disagree with the comments of the previous speaker. I recall, Nanda apologised. So did Madhuri. Dharmendra, however, has not yet apologised. It should be Dharmendra who could be the real man behind this "’Insult Nepal campaign". But I have no proof sir.

Culture minister: I do not see the hands of Dharmendra. He is now old and is happy with Hema. So why he should harbor any ill towards Nepal. In my opinion, some "unemployed youths " in Chitwan created this fake story perhaps to exhibit their retaliation of the police firings made against the female folks of the Maoists wing that caused Gauri Sapkota’s life. Later the Himalaya Times reported it and the nation knew about it. It is newspaper men who created this scene sir.

Communication minister: Mr. Premier, I see sense in the remarks of the speaker who spoke just before me. However, I also see the hands of some "’alien" forces from neighboring countries to have assisted the Chitwan unemployed ones only to harass us. The Maoists’ subtle hand can’t be ruled here. It all has happened after our coterie suspected that Deuba was speaking the language of the Maoists. So Deuba’s hands can’t be ruled out Mr. Prime Minister.

PM: I too think so. Look how my party enemies hastened to embarrass me when I was having pressures from all sides. The manner they have pushed the no confidence motion against me gives the impression that some outside agencies too have favored Deuba in his fresh bid to unseat me from the chair I love most. However, which could be that agency is difficult to ascertain.

Home minister: I suspect the hands of the ISI and some muslim fundamentalists in creating unrest in Nepal but it has yet to be substantiated.

PM: But how you could conclude that it should be ISI and others you mentioned just now?

Home Minister: Look Mr. Premier, since Hritik only recently married a Muslim women so it might not have pleased the Muslim community in Mumbai and they might have sought the support of the ISI to retort. Who knows subtle Osama’s hand in the whole episode.

PM: You are talking dangerous thing. Do not suspect others unless you have some proofs.

Home minister: That’s right. But one declared RAW man confidentially told me about the involvement of the ISI in it. Interestingly, Mr. Premier, it could only be RAW who recognizes the ISI. One agency recognizing the other.

Community development minister: I disagree with the statements of previous speaker. It could be that the Hindu fundamentalist did not like the marriage of Hritik with a muslim girl and hence might have reacted in this manner. Consider how Dibya Bharati had to commit suicide (?) after she married a muslim boy. I was told that both the muslim and the Hindu community harassed her to the extent that she preferred to embrace death.

PM: Yes there is point in your revelation. Yes next speaker please!

Foreign minister: Stop it please. Do not make speeches that bring rift in our communal harmony. We have a track record of having brotherly relationships with practically all the communities more specially between the Hindus and the muslims. Do not forget that Bijaya didi was married to Akram Zaki-a Pakistani. It was this relation that enhanced our bilateral ties since then. More so I’m visiting shortly Dhaka-a majority muslim capital, so I do not want to provide then questions regarding the tate of our relations with muslim countries. Look how tolerant they are. They have sent one Christian Ambassador to a country having Hindus in overwhelming majority. Let us follow their example.

PM: Excellent! Excellent. I liked your sentimental speech. Proceed.

Foreign minister: I was bit perplexed by Malkani’s statement. However, our man in Delhi acted quickly and thus things are now under control. Or else any thing could have happened. Oh! God is simply great.

Bhuban K.C: Look how sensitive are the Indian citizens. They too banned Manisha’s films in several states out of retaliation. It was just a tit for tat measure to our fury against Hritik.

PM: Whatever has happened in the recent days perhaps is a reaction of the people against our malperformance and bad governance. Some elements used the people’s wrath against us for their benefits. The Maoists’ , the nine left parties and others such as the media too all joined apparently the hands of Deuba and Bhattarai to destabilise my rule. I will have to devise some new schemes to arrest the deteriorating situation in the count.

Cabinet secretary: I agree with you Mr. Prime Minister. It is all our fault. If we do not deliver the people will hate us and more and more we remain aloof from the people and their grievances the more they will sympathise with the insurgents. Neither Deuba is speaking the language of the Maoists nor the people were against you and your government. However, the home minister should tell the police not to open fire on innocent civilians. Firing should start only if the situation is beyond control. It should be the last resort measure only. Let all the Nepalese unite and develop this nation. By way of reference Mr. Prime Minister, my humble suggestion would be to you to resume the dialogues with the Maoists. They too were the sons of the soil. Finally let us not suspect others in our faults. Why should RAW or for that matter the ISI come to intervene in our internal matters. Poor Hritik.


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